感情？Feelings.

钱

2010-07-20T23:50:00.000-07:00

让开始不想往不实际的人生而去……在这个现实的人生里，钱还是最重要的。每一天，我要烦钱不够用的日子，每天三餐我要省掉一餐来存一些钱起来。至少没钱时可以用，工作？我能做什么工？课业太忙，没有人要学我这类乐器，钱，已经慢慢沾满我的脑袋，腐蚀我。

果然，“没钱就别学人家读音乐。” 不是为了讽刺，而是现实的结论。

梦

2010-05-21T21:41:00.000-07:00

梦，是多么的遥远；

梦，是多么的渺茫。

一步一步，慢慢的。

踏上这个不归路的路途，

我没有后退的选择，

也没有后退的理由。

种种困难，曲折；

我已经不是以前那个自己。

我只能更冷静，更理智。

果然，长大一点也不好受。

梦，能够多美妙？

梦，让我们有了希望。

但是，往往希望都只有绝望。

因为，没有实现的原则在里面。

压力，只是推动力，

没有他我不会在这里。

人，是很无理的；

没有折磨一下，不会进步。

我的心，

在中点，没有支撑。

我很现实，钱最大。

但我也很有哲学，人生道理最重要。

佛学，只是理由。

我不信任何东西，但我知道他们存在。

我尊重他们，但不信。

人生，痛苦中要享受。

懂得快乐，就是人生。

懂得难过，也是人生。

任何事，只要看开就能解脱。

但梦，不是道理能讲通的。

一个人放弃了它，

留下的是遗憾。

遗憾中，没有人能感受。

这不是一时的，

是一生的。

追求吧！

永远不会迟。

2010-05-15T06:12:00.000-07:00

1) You'd rather practice 1 hour of full focus than 3 hours of non-focus practice.

2) The earlier you change the habit, the better you are.

3) Any accident that happen during performance is a surprise.

Is it the pressure myself? or it's already there?

2010-05-06T11:38:00.000-07:00

It's my last semester here... have to really work hard for it. Chose to do some crazy stuff out, going to play mozart clarinet quintet for my CME, and hopefully it went well... and still thinking what to play for the jury, decided to play Poulenc clarinet sonata 1st movement, still 2 more contrasting pieces to decide... and Dr. Nicholas Ong gave me a... "quite" easy piece... which is... very hard for me, he say he would like to play it in the CME concert this semester...

Gosh... I'm really pressured in the very first week of the semester... i don't know if it was myself who was giving the pressure all along or... it's the pressure itself is there.... I have to take a breath... and I can't, I don't have the time to stop and relax, I have to make sure myself to practice everything to almost perfect before I could even let myself to take a rest... every bar every phrase... I'm forcing myself to the limits....

lecturers are talking about me for leaving UCSI... yeah... I'm leving guys... seriously it's not a good place to stay over for a clarinet majot student... I want to expand and improve myself to reach my dream. A dream where I would sacrifice everything for it. Wish me goodluck then... damn it's late... night guys....

失去了一些

2010-04-30T19:21:00.001-07:00

我不知道... 可能是因为太忙了? 还是我太沉迷一些东西... 我失去了自己... 早上醒来我发觉我不知道要做些什么, 我不知道人生中出了什么问题. 可能我可以怪金钱, 为了出国家人为了我烦金钱问题, 连平时我都不敢随便跟家人要钱... 我太忽略了她... 太忽略了课业, 练习. 真的需要调整生活了... 有点规划应该会比较好吧?

那个自己... 我能找回来吗?

希望如此.

气·心疼

2010-03-13T19:24:00.000-08:00

我不明白，什么是体贴；

是24小时在你身边？

还是不停照料着你？

我不知道，你想要什么；

我承认我很不体贴，

我也承认我太自私。

想问，

为什么流泪，

你摇摇头不答。

想问，

为什么不答，

你说不重要。

果真，

爱情不是靠个心就了得，

对男生而言可能，

对女生而言却是不能。

我不会生气你骂我，

就算你统统讲我的是非，

气我的不是；

我会好好想想一切，

慢慢为你改进。

我不会生气你讲我，

但是我会气你不告诉我，

为了什么而自己一人流泪。

为什么我不能知道？

而你有权利自己哭。

你知道吗？

当在不明白的情况下，

被周围的人讽刺，

那是多么无辜的心情。

那是多么心疼得心情。

我好像突然被子弹射到，

而那开枪的人说你活该。

来不及明白情况，

就倒下了。

朋友说，

事情会过去的，不要担心。

我说，

过去有能代表什么？

我不要你一个人偷偷流泪，

我不要，不要。

你知道吗？

当你流泪时，

我得压着心里的疼痛，摆个搞笑的样子。

我得想尽办法让你好些，不可以让你觉得我也心疼。

我真的好想哭。

可是不能，如果我哭，

事情不会变好，唯有把自己装得坚强，

那晚，我想了好多。

我明白我做的都不对。

但是，我想说的，

跟你在一起的任何时刻，

没有一刻我是瞒着你。

没有一刻我是装出来的。

你睡觉时，

我喜欢打扰你，

因为那是少许的时间里，

我能紧紧拥抱你的一刻。

如果你有不满，

请尽管说出来好吗？

我不要再被关在鼓里。

当我发现大家都对我不满时，

我气他们不明白，

而且把话说得这么难听。

但是，当你很高兴的找我聊天时，

我想起你哭的那一刻，

我无法理解一切，

我突然觉的你一直都骗我。

直到第二天早上，

你把一切都告诉我时，

我才明白。

看，

我真的很笨吧？

他妈的……

2010 新年

2010-02-15T07:20:00.000-08:00

12/2 下午开车离开吉隆坡到槟城北海，一路上幸好有PSP的陪伴和女友的SMS，4个钟的路程很快就抵达了。路途中有些塞车，不过都还好啦~女友也是差不多同一时间回槟城，她说看到我……不过我在玩PSP所以没注意。嘿嘿~

13/2 中午去外公家，在那里呆了一阵子。下午就去婆婆的“家+老人院+果园” 帮忙准备晚上的“团圆饭”，忙了整个下午，晚上吃饱了然后叔叔们跑去放烟花……最后帮忙洗地才可以回去好好安眠。累了，什么也不想做……就倒下去好了。

14/2 情人节+年初一，早上看了一半的Zombieland然后去婆婆的“家”，哪里已经有好多好多人来捐钱，用品等。然后妈妈就载我去Ferry站搭轮船到槟岛找其他人。等XC他们来载我后赶快去买了一束玫瑰准备送给女友。结果全部人在XC家闹无聊时，突然决定去Gurney Plaza买Chips来玩Poker。那知道Gurney Plaza 里的店竟然都不做生意，年初一没办法咯~改去YQ家，拿花生来当Chips。可恶的是，在YQ家竟然见“血光”不知道踩到什么东西，拔出来时脚底竟然流了不少血。不过可能脚底皮比较厚，不会太痛。最后回家，二叔说他们吃饱了，我们自己煮泡面吃。可恶！晚上无聊到跑去读4Part writing到半夜1点。厉害吧！

15/2 年初二，去外婆家，半途中老爸跟妹妹去婆婆那里帮忙，因为很多人回来捐款。结果留下我跟小妹两个人无聊到躺在沙发上不知睡了多久。傍晚时去二舅家，幸好那里有Wii可以玩，晚上跟老爸那里的家人去Auto-City的Winter White吃晚餐，还不错，吃饱了就回来咯~

明天2.30pm要自己先回吉隆坡，要准备Mid-term跟很多歌曲。是该开工了。就这样，2010的新年虽然很简单，但是我却意外的喜欢。哈哈哈~

p.s 我也不知道自己在写什么……lol

Wallet bleeding day.

2010-01-30T18:14:00.001-08:00

Let me see... Now is 10.14 a.m, and I'm going out to fetch dear around 10.45am and we're going to sg.wang. First thing to do there is to find some freaking Norwegian composer pieces, either arranged or not arranged, I just need some standard nice piece for me to perform on march pleaseeee.... Then, I need to get myself some new year shirts since parents are starting to nag about it.. then... might going to get a Sennheiser headphone in Lowyat... or not will just go to pyramid to continue our shirt shopping... alright... having stomachache... had to go now.

感情？

2010-01-02T07:08:00.000-08:00

他妈的！真的要先骂一下才爽。什么倒数30天，老兄……30天什么啊？还跟我在“非死不可”搞Married状态……你赢了咯？

其实自己也好不到哪里……竟然转个头……就追其他人。

也好啦~新的一年，要有新的开始！不管了，好好享受和珍惜每一个时光吧~

亲爱的，谢谢你。

What a trip... to an end.

2009-12-29T06:15:00.000-08:00

Alright... Since there are peoples who pass by my blog and keep complaining I wrote most of the stuff here in Chinese and they couldn't read it... I told you to learn Chinese before didn't I? Ahhh... Whatever, better straight to the point now.

Lets start from December 9.. where Tian Yi and I went to Old Town to have our breakfast along with 2 BIG bags of luggage and we met Tomato and Xin Che there... also having their breakfast. After a very inexpensive (Compare to the Genting) breakfast and we pulled our freaking heavy luggage up to Block A... Luckily Block A!!! If it's Block C... both of us will be start shitting about the weight of the luggage. Most of the people arrived earlier there, and interestingly... Part of the luggage is MUSICAL INSTRUMENT!!! Yes... Are we going up to Genting as choir group or... Band? I brought both my wife, Ken Ny brought his wife and interestingly Zi Ming have the same model of guitar to Ken Ny's but... Why is he bringing along the guitar?? Audrey with her Sax and Carmen with her Xeno. Stephen's full size keyboard which is for the caroling use and Kevin's new Acoustic guitar... (I suppose?) And other than these instruments, everyone seems to be moving their house... Pillows, PSP, CASINO SET, Monopoly and MORE...

Now... after passing my stuff to Tim, I had to go back to prepare for my F&A final in the noon. Then after the exam, all I can do is surf the net where all I do most of the time is clicking the refresh button because the line is darn slow... Until night when Janice came back then only we start study CE... and that's how my 9th of Dec pass by...

The another day... straight after the CE exam, I took the other part of my luggage and asked mom to fetch me to the bus station... the bus leaves at 1.30pm, and I had to wait for an hour with a hungry stomach and tired body... Finally... relieved when the bus arrived... then... took bus until mid-mountain the took the cable car.... Where I start thinking how to survive if the cable car dropped down. Then arrived nicely on the top and went to find the others in the Pavilion, where is the place we practice.

Errr.... I think I had to stop right here... Since it's late and it's too much to update... I'm lazy ya' know? Anyway, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Looking forward to 31st of December... maybe it's the last 31st December I will be spending here. Specially with someone special this year. HEHE~~

Life

2009-12-10T08:57:00.000-08:00

We are too young to understand what is Life. I thought that life is that simple and joyful. But when it comes to a bigger confront... we will just be shocked and say nothing.

If someone tell me he/she is dying soon.... I really have no idea what to response... and... I should start thinking what should i reply...

笑

2009-12-08T12:35:00.000-08:00

我喜欢笑，因为有一次在报纸看见多笑可以活久一点。以前我真的很爱哭，一点点就哭了……哭到乱七八糟。中学时，我发誓不再哭。可是就那么一次跟老爸吵架，委屈得哭了。哭到不知道该怎样停下来，可能是把一直压在心里的一切都哭出来了吧？好久，我忘了哭的感觉。我忘了，哭可以很开心。

当一个人强忍住不让眼泪掉下时，那时他人生中最痛苦的其中一件事。

男孩子，哭什么哭，丢死人了。

男孩从小，就被“训练”不该流泪。不管是什么地方，什么种族，不管多文化都好。男生不该流泪这种“事实”是大自然的“无理”之一。尽管，你叫他哭，如果不必，哭是很难的。

我，就是这样的人。

你问我，不会伤心吗？我会笑笑回答，伤心什么？然后带着微笑转过头，不让你看见悲伤的一面。

你说是面子的问题？可能吧……男生都会爱面子吧？

好几次，看到爸爸被老妈骂时，他都很无奈。明明只是不小心，就要被骂到天花乱醉。为什么，他还可以微笑的面对老妈？被骂时还可以笑笑、静静的被骂？

老爸，你赢了。

可能我遗传了你这一点。不管怎样，那一片心海永远那么宽大，永远可以沉淀一切。

我，喜欢笑。

尽管是假笑，我也觉得是一件好事。

哭？

就算世界末日来了，哭也没有用。

当哭没用时，你就应该笑。

来……笑一个！

2009-12-03T08:19:00.000-08:00

今天刚考完马来文……真的……如果会fail那你真的很烂了……然后现在准备Moral……也不懂要读些什么……看来看去都没有重点，什么Aristotle, Utilitarianism等……只知道明天文章跟它写个乱七八糟应该可以pass的。

现在完全没有心情去读书……不懂自己在搞什么……

朋友就快失恋了……原因很简单，不适合。我们这几个老友，什么都好就是太深情。真的……我们太笨了。中学时，为了一个女生消耗了自己中学的岁月。写了一大堆情信，最后什么也没有……真的很蠢啊！中学的我们，太单纯了。我们在情窦初开的那一刻，忘记了一切。只知道什么叫猛追，什么叫死缠烂打。我们跑去喝酒，他妈的明明已经醉了还死撑继续灌。好像很厉害，明明就是很烂！哈哈……放假跑去网吧玩通宵……考试前拼了命去读还不忘记要怎样在毕业前告白……

十多岁的我们……在爱情里……真的太可爱了。那时完全不懂什么叫放弃，不懂什么叫离开。

现在的我们，明白了很多。一下子长大了不少，人生不是停留在他妈的爱情里。我们有太多的梦想去追，至少梦想可以给我回报。爱情？又也可，没有也可。

30天倒数，你……真的太温柔了。外表每天装到这样坚强，打架拳头这样有力。没想到，感情上，你真的很温柔。如果是我，我早就不留下任何温柔了……可能……我已经心死了。

心死，这句话是你先说的。

可是，我先走一步了。我真的受够了。可能是我的问题……可是，我不想爱了。

我相信你明白心疼的感觉。很痛很痛……痛到完全没有感觉。这一次，我第一次感觉想哭，可是……我不能哭。那时真的很对不起半夜玩琴吓倒的那些朋友们……哈哈……

现在，不可以想太多了。我要前进。

兄弟，30天后，如果要出来泄气……欢迎啊……这次……我要3支了……两支不够了。

最后留在这里好了……

我的心一直想说的。

不是对你啊！！

他妈的我不喜欢star war!!!

这是……一直没有机会说出口的……

我爱你。

路过

2009-11-22T06:57:00.000-08:00

深夜里，慢慢领悟。

原来，这一切的由来。

知道，不知道的故事。

明白，不明白的道理。

该不该，大声哭泣。

原来，是自己太愚笨。

等到，碰到钉子时候。

明白，从来没有自己。

我努力爱你，但不理解你。

他比我爱你，但你离去。

我以为，自己

能够慢慢等你。

但是，这一切都是我想太多。

他努力爱你，但你想离去。

你想要爱他，但你后退了。

他以为，自己。

能够慢慢等你。

但是，这一切都是他想太多。

他和你，有过我不知道的回忆。

原来，我从来没有在你眼里出现过。

等到，明白之后我才，

眼泪，都慢慢流进心里。

我努力爱你，但不理解你。

他比我爱你，但你离去。

我以为，自己

能够慢慢等你。

但是，这一切都是我想太多。

他努力爱你，但你想离去。

其实你爱他，你为何放弃？

他以为，自己。

能够慢慢等你。

但是，这一切都是他想太多~

明白了一切，我只是路过。

看到一对接近完美结局。

原来，

这故事里，主角不是我~

我努力爱你，但你不懂我。

他比我爱你，我看在眼里。

我以为，自己，

能够慢慢爱你。

但是，这一切都是我想太多。

他努力爱你，你看到了吗？

其实你爱他，就不要放手。

你以为，自己。

这样就能忘了他……

但是，其实你知道你还爱他……

我只是路过的人……

看到，

我爱的人。

我们都太笨。

2009-11-21T17:00:00.000-08:00

真的。

我们都太笨了。

太自以为是了。

我们以为，真心去付出爱。

就能够感动她。

但是我们忽略了，她。

我们以为，自己能够感动她。

能够得到回应。

但是我们都忘了，她。

她有自己的梦想。

你知道吗？

她有自己的目标。

你知道吗？

每一天，都能看到她一点一点努力的成绩。

你看到吗？

希望你知道。

真的。

我们太笨了。

我明白了。

希望你也明白。

“我感动天感动地，

就是感动不了你。”

但你真的做到最好了吗？

对不起，我一直不知道自己的处状。

对不起，我该走了。

“也许我还不能够彻底把你忘记，

至少我懂适当时离去。”

我永远明白这一点。

因为经历了不少。

努力吧。

你，我，她。

这里，

没有我了。

我，真的该走了。

加油。

心

2009-11-19T09:27:00.000-08:00

太疼。

疼到，没有感觉。

努力寻找回那感觉。

被伤过的男生，都明白这道理。

只好努力达到自己的人生目标。

什么是爱？

爱只是阻碍你往前的东西。

这是，

我们之间的同感。

睡不着的夜晚

2009-11-18T09:00:00.000-08:00

明天七早八早有课……理论上我应该睡觉了……但是怎样都好……我睡不着……救命……很多时候……我们自己真的想太多了……多到他妈的躺下去整个脑都在想一些有的没的……我该不该，我不知道。我只知道……我想这样做。

他妈的……我在想什么……

决定

2009-11-04T05:26:00.000-08:00

已决定，

没有后退的路了。

加油吧。

等待的笨蛋

2009-11-01T08:39:00.000-08:00

朋友说，不要做笨蛋。

不该等待太久。

朋友说，不要再等了。

这样并不值得。

谁能告诉我……

答案？

我等你，

半年为期预期就，

狠狠把你忘记。

没有答案的答案

2009-10-31T10:41:00.000-07:00

你说，

情的道理，

也说，

理里的情。

我说，

你不懂情，

再说，

你不懂爱。

如果，

你懂爱情，

这样，

恨是借口。

如果，

不懂爱情，

这样，

恨是理由。

不必多说，

你明白就好。

不必多说，

你要就发泄。

不必多说，

没有理由的。

不必多说，

被骗是借口。

男人，

女人。

理解，

不解。

你说，

男人都是这样。

我说，

男人本来这样。

但是，

你不必我明白。

什么是放手。

因为，

放手是，

没有答案的答案。

为你

2009-10-16T08:47:00.000-07:00

《想》

回想，

回想。

你还好吗？

希望比以前好。

回想，

回想。

你记得吗？

我被你咬伤时。

回想，

回想。

你饿了吗？

记得吃多一点。

没有了你，

那门前多了份寂寞。

没有了你，

那门前少了份欢乐。

没有了你，

那门前多了份安静。

我还记得，

真的。

我还想念，

真的。

我还伤心，

真的。

伤心的理由，

为你？

去死吧！

《回家》

每次回家，

第一个想你。

每次回家，

第一个见你。

你，

是否一样？

你，

是否那样？

我相信，

因为，你就是那个样子。

那个，

我忘不了的样子。

你，

是否那样？

你，

是否还是？

我相信，

因为，没有其它比你更笨的了。

那个，

让我微笑的样子。

还记得吗？

我们一起渡过的日子。

那些，

好的坏的。

那些，

我想念的。

还记得吗？

我们一起读过的科目。

历史，

真他妈的。

商业，

多到晕的。

院子的草，有些长了。

你有注意过吗？

应该没有吧？

哈哈……

院子里的草，被剪断了。

你有注意过吗？

这个应该有。

哈哈……

你喜欢坐在那，

靠在门旁，

静静地听我们聊天。

好想问问你呐，

你听懂吗？

我看你只是会吃吧？

你喜欢睡午觉，

靠在门旁，

静静地但很警惕的。

你喜欢我们疼，

靠在身旁，

让我们摆弄你那柔软的毛。

真的……

你最怕冲凉，

每次冲凉，

就是地牢。

你最怕水沟，

每次渡过，

都要我拉。

真的……

太多太多；

太多太多。

如果能再来，我愿意多疼你一些。

《期待·再见》

我们期待了好久。

我真的，

真的。

幻想你在门外等我们。

等我们。

真的。

我想为你哭，

但是不能。

因为哭了，

代表，

你已不在了。

我想为你笑，

但是不能。

因为笑了，

代表，

你已不在了。

我忍住了。

我知道，

你可能，

不会再回来。

我忍住了。

我知道，

你可能，

已不在了。

我决定，

不辜负，

我们一起，

读过的书。

渡过的岁月。

他妈的小狗，我爱死你了。

《抱着你》

抱着你，
感觉毛毛的，
好像抱毛球。

抱着你，
感觉温暖的，
真的很窝心。

抱着你，
感觉安心很，
不需要想太多。

抱着你，
暂时忘了它，
不让它烦我。

抱着你，
想说很多很多，
虽然你可能听不懂。

抱着你，
想到明天一早，
就要帮你洗澡。

抱着你，
就这样简单，
快乐。

一辈子的手

2009-10-13T20:47:00.000-07:00

淡淡的香味钩住了我的心

你的身影有自己的光彩

坐在你身旁让我不禁想看你

看着你的侧脸你那漂亮的脸蛋

就多一秒好吗？

多一秒而已让我感觉到你的美

多一秒而已让我默默地爱上你

多一秒而已让我想牵你的手

多一秒而已让我失去了理智

知道吗？

如果能够，

我要带你去旅行，

让你感觉这世界，

让微笑在你脸上；

如果能够，

我要写好多好多，

好多好多的情信，

让你觉得很肉麻。

知道吗？

如果能够，

我要陪你去买菜，

帮你拿菜蓝选菜，

让其他人羡慕你；

如果能够，

我要抱着你讨论，

我们之间的梦想，

然后一起去实现。

知道吗？

如果能够，

我要写首情歌给你，

让我们以后拿来唱，

然后笑说我写得多烂；

如果能够，

我要帮你做家务，

可能我做得不够好，

但我愿意再做。

如果你问我为什么，

我会说，

因为我被你迷住了。

完全的。

不要问我，

为什么被你迷住。

因为，

我想，

这不是重点，

重点是我爱上了你。

也不要问我，

为什么爱你。

因为，

我就是爱你，没有其他理由。

如果你问我爱你多少，

我可以用月亮来代表我的心，

但这不够浪漫。

最浪漫的，

是当你在我身边，

牵着我的手时，

我告诉你，

我愿意牵你一辈子的手。

有些事，一转身就是一辈子

2009-10-09T06:02:00.000-07:00

Question and Answer

2009-09-28T09:22:00.000-07:00

Q: What is love.

A: No answer.

Q: Why people need love?

A: People wants something they do not understand.

Q: Why emotion are conflicted by stuff like love?

A: It's just a chemical reaction in the human body.

Q: Why do guy need love?

A: Guy needs sex more than love. It's just the chemical response as said above.

Q: Then why do girls need love?

A: They need something that can overcome the feelings. Same as above chemical response.

Q: If it's only chemical response to the brain, can we overcome it?

A: No, because even it's the chemical response to the brain, human still give reasons to the stuff they wanted.

Q: For god sake... why it's only chemical function in your brain?

A: Because I believe I had some great flows of chemical reaction in my body. And I would loved to clear it out if can.

Q: Then go back. What is love to you?

A: Something I can't get.

人生

2009-09-25T10:28:00.001-07:00

想了想，再想……突然领悟了一些事。之前看过一片日本的连续集（没有看完），里面说道：人，往往会迷失了自己。就像婚礼，常常人们走到红地毯时才发现，原来另一半并不是自己最爱的那一位。

人生的另一半，永远不会有几个是美好的。

就像张栋梁的一首歌说到：

这是你要的吗
你能不能回答　为何你眼中还有挣扎
是不是在想他他比我更好吗　寂寞的时候会想我还是他
不应该再等待不要再受伤害　爱过以后我却只能说
终于明白可能有时候　爱总是不完美

Life

2009-09-18T03:48:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I received my dear Buffet R13 clarinet in A. So happy. And some of us went to mid-valley to watch movie... "Orphan" ok... it's kinda thrilling but.. best don't know the story before you watch. When we go back and pass thru Suwen's house as she go and take some stuff. Saw the owner's daughter. The little naughty active girl. Wonder if she knew she was going to move out this weekend. When watching her... I can't imagine how does it feels to have a complicated parents (I don't really know.. just Suwen them told us the stories) Feel pity, sad for her. Such little girl and she might had to wait maybe a week just to see her dad once.. while the other normal happy child could wait for their dad to come back home from work and ask for a hug.

Wish she could grow up normally with the other children, fate won't be so cruel to her.

Thinking back to myself I felt was so lucky in almost everything in my life. I had a family, I get to study what I wanted. I really appreciate it. So I might wanna work more harder to prove more of myself so I wont upset the ones who give me the chance and the ones who loves me.

2009-09-11T05:35:00.000-07:00

Time passed by real fast... from the day I went into UCSI to study music till now... it's already my 3rd semester. And in somehow it's my Foundation Jury sem. Althought I did not fear so much of it but instead I had my mid set off to a few stuff. 2 CME, 2 Jury (Mine and Ai Jia's contemp jury), my recital, audition for Birmingham Conservatoire. After decided to play two freakin hard piece for jury.. it's something headache for finding accompanist. As for finding accompanist I wish them could help me to accompany the audition too. Because I'm thinking to play those two pieces for audition.

I've always wanted to go oversea to study, few of the reason is because the exposure and the enviroment. But one of the most reason is because I want to look around the world. I loved to walk around sometimes in places so that I can think and mind my own business while enjoy looking peoples around me. Maybe it sounds so "romantic"?

Some the friends gone to oversea and start their own journey. Hoped that I can join in that oversea dreams with them as well. Now, I study along with laughters and critics, where I do really enjoy these times. Alot of people kept calling me to go oversea with hundreds of random reasons but I came out with this word where every friends who insist to live here and enjoy the lifes here would maybe agrees.

If I break my life into pieces what will I get? Maybe I will found some orange and apples, but I would really enjoy every taste of it. Even though it might not be the best apples and orange.

2009-08-26T22:25:00.000-07:00

Pass this tag to 10 people: -

1. Jia wai
2. Rou Yen

3. irene
4. Ing yii

5. Kenny
6. Timothy
7. Yun
8. Kuang yee
9. yong chin
10. Su wen

1. Would you date number 5?
- NEVER

2. Number 2 just got a car crash and how do you react?
- Wow.. Lucky I'm not in the car...

3. You see no.9 with your boy/girlfriend. What do you do?
- I WILL KILL YOU!

4. You come home and your room has been ransacked by number 4.
- Err... How you got the keys to my room?

5. Number 1 is acting weird.
- That's his normal mode.

6. Number 3 and 8 decide to give 10 a haircut.
- I don't think they know each other.. if they know... su wen going to stay in house for a month to regrow her hair...

7. Number 7 just got a ticket for him/her and you to go to a concert.
- Sure~ As long as you don't keep hitting my stomuch...

8. Number 10 takes you to a bar.
- Pretty sure she is very emo

9. No. 4 has to move to the other side of the world.
- Please don't... I will follow you.

10. You and number 8 are being chased by the cops for an unknown reason.
- Err.. bro what you done...

11. Number 7 and you sitting on the couch watching a movie when her/him wrap his/her arm around you.
- I will pretend asleep. lol

12. Number 5 ask you out for dinner.
- Go lo~

13. Number 9 and you are sitting on the bus.
- I will start talking craps

14. Number 6 calls you in the middle of night because she/he can't sleep.
- My reply:" WTF!! Go call your gf instead la!"

15. You're walking with someone and number 6 runs up and tackles you to the ground from behind.
- My reply:" WTF!! You wanna die is it!"

16. Number 1 is crying one day and you ask him/her why and it seems their boy/girlfriend has dumped them.
- Err... come lets go mamak.

17. Number 2 offers to bake you a meal. As you sit in the other room, the kitchen suddenly aflame.
- Omg... She never get anything right huh? I will remember to buy insurance...

18. Number 4 comes to your door one day holding a koala.
- Err... Where the hell you steal that from? But its' cute...

19. Number 4 just got u an x-box.
- That will be one of the best gift I ever had in my life.

20. Number 1 thinks he/she's overweight
- Go do more gym then.

21. Number 7 looks lonely.
- Come lets go mamak.

22.Number 2 asks you rudely to go leave him/her alone.
- Siam imediately.

23. Number 5 and 3 decide to throw a surprise party for you.
- No throwing cakes and funny stuff.

24. Number 6 decide to dye her/his hair black. What do you say about that?
- =.= You got too much money eh?

25. Number 7 tells you he/she is going to go out for a while, and then later you hear about a shooting where he/she went.
- Pretty sure she shot someone.

26. Number 1, 3, 5 and 6 all tackle at you once. Is it possible?

- Not Sure... but.. I will die of weight.

2009-08-25T01:49:00.001-07:00

该不该思考

没有这个必要

我明白

我们之间的不同

想不想放弃

不想这样结束

我理解

我们不同的世界

不要再说再见

就算走到了最后

我能明白

两个不同的世界

能有多少关怀

不要再说再见

就算我们都明白

就当是求你

让我偷偷的爱你

这样藏在心里

2009-08-21T10:15:00.000-07:00

命硬

他反对就反对
亦都跟你爱下去
犹如在大战炮火里
毫无惧色冲过去
谁狂怒谁拦路
谁话我共谁不登对
无能力与霸权比赛
还是可比他多老几岁

二百年后在一起
应该不怕旁人不服气
团圆或者晚了廿个十年
仍然未舍弃
换个时代在一起
等荆棘满途全枯死
这盼望很悠长
亦决心等到尾
等得起

先殉了情不对
未反击过已后退
宁凭着耐性与骨气
维持自尊撑过去
谁强韧谁长寿
谁便算胜利击不碎
仍然共你企在这里
捱着等身边指控死去

二百年后在一起
应该不怕旁人不服气

谁人又可控诉廿个十年

仍然未舍弃
换个时代在一起
等荆棘满途全枯死
这盼望很悠长
撑到尾

就算贫病或失忆
都争口气从旁保护你
顽强地等再过廿个十年
等整个世界换风气
历劫还是在一起
这种坚决无人可比
看战事多悠长
亦决心打到尾
心不死

2009-08-21T09:52:00.000-07:00

《男人海洋》

当我抱着你的时候
窗外风起黄叶飘落
以为是浪漫
原来只是有心在飞走

不懂情人心里想的
爱就瞎了也迷路了
想摸索什么
摸到了你手心的沉默

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀
送给你飞翔

不懂情人心里想的
爱就瞎了也迷路了
想摸索什么
摸到了你手心的沉默

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀
送给你飞翔

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀
送给你飞翔

CME Concert

2009-08-07T07:54:00.000-07:00

Finally gone through this sems CME... with helping Zhi Wen and Johan's CME. It's lucky for me to joined them because I learned so much stuff about ensemble and with the coaching under Dr. Lim, I do learned something in playing music. Eventhough at the starting that people told me that I might gone into CME concert.. but I really never thought of playing there... and finally both group gets into the concert... when I hear the news... my first thought is... "OMG... need to play again?!" especially Johan's group... because the last part was hard for me as my technical skills are not quite there yet to play that properly. In the end Dr. Lim asked me to play it all slurred and atleast we get the feel out of it. "Plan your phrase." Dr.Lim told me. Where I never done that before, in the past to me playing a music is just play music until where i felt its nice to me, it's a none planning system for me... but now I do learned that with a planning is a basics while Johan teached me:" Sometimes a little accident is a surprise."

Had to apologize to Zhi Wen them because I was always late to practice with them and... without music stands... I should have change my attitude in attending practice. Playing with them let me learned to be more stick to pulse and phrashing and dynamic controls. Thanks to all of the members in the group. From Sim Li (By listening comments from Dr. Lim it's really something I learned how to listen to the piano), Winston (Listening to his phrashing and learn how to do that), Terrence (Pointing out the phrasing part of mine and... gave quite a laughter haha), Zhi wen (Giving me such an opportunity and for being so kind to my lateness).

For Johan and Yik Ling, this is something really new to me. Vocal+Clarinet+Piano, eventhought I'd heard that clarinet is really suitable to match with vocal because calrinet have a sweet and voicing sounds, but it's really the very first time to work out with them. Again thanks to Johan for helping me out in the last part... (I have no idea how much time we spent on that...) and Yik Ling for singing those parts again and again... Learned how to move a music and more... its' really an experience working with you all.

Finally at the CME concert... to be truth I was quite nervous... To perform infront of everybody... althought before I had been playing with bands... but we have so many people in a band... but trio, quintet... it's my first time though... trying to clam myself down and praying to play out my best. While it's Zhi Wen's group turn, I had to calm myself down for preventing letting others to saw my shivering knees... luckily it all went well. Except a few little mistakes and miss-playing. But the nervousness havent' stop after that because I had Johan's group... and that is something... I really scared of. I couldn't play nicely on the last running part because... as I said before my techical skills are not there yet. and finally with some "special" arrangements... I could play it... atleast finish it... with several problems. In the perform... I try not to think the freaking last part but to enjoy and concentrate the current malody and when finally the last part came... surprisingly it went quite well! And ends with what we have expecting before. At that time, I really feel so happy... I done it atlest 50% (Because without tonguing)... That is really an amazing moment where I feel... this is so nice and fun man!

Finally... end up in mamak eating the another half of my dinner... haha... anyway... I had achieved such great experience from playing for CME this year. Will work more harder from now on! Ok... enough... now... movie time... haha

答案

2009-08-01T08:45:00.000-07:00

朋友变情人再变朋友

品冠

安靜的房間　還有你的溫柔　躺在棉被上　看著多的枕頭
為何分手後　回憶就被偷走　愛情走到盡頭　是否可以做朋友

你和我　以前是朋友　心情不錯　就想約你走走
你聊電影　我聽你唱歌　我們總是　無話不說

還能做朋友　或許這是　最好的結果
朋友變情人再變朋友　誰懂這坎坷

愛上你以後　失意也很輕鬆　現實太殘酷　夢中你會擁抱我
當愛上以後　如今我們分手　我變成情歌手　是唱太多芭樂歌

你和我　現在是朋友　你那麼好　卻只能做朋友
你裝冷漠　我裝無所謂　我們如何　要求更多

還能做朋友　或許這是　最好的結果
朋友變情人再變朋友　只能寫成歌

朋友變情人再變朋友　祝我們快樂

微笑

2009-07-31T04:19:00.000-07:00

抛开一切梦想，

抛开所有烦恼，

还有什么？

抛开一切大志，

抛开一切悲伤，

还有什么？

不必太多解释，

只要一点解放；

不要太多烦恼，

只要好好睡觉。

笑笑，微笑，

管它天大的工作，

管它天大的困难，

让一切都归明天而去。

笑笑，微笑，

管它梦想困难，

管它多累多难，

让一切都停留一会儿。

不要烦恼，

不要悲伤。

不要苦恼，

不要一切。

笑笑，微笑，

管它多大烦恼，

下一秒成为空虚。

就让自己休息一会儿吧！

笑笑，微笑，

管它梦想多大，

休息休息喝杯茶。

为了走更长远的路啊！

Freaking LAN subjects!!!

2009-07-24T05:50:00.000-07:00

This week many of us struggle to do course selection... and luckily I done it... without any problems because I've planned my courses... and who knows... when I open the e-advantage to check either my courses were passed by the head of school...

When i opened... it wrote "APPROVED" and down there it there were notes from head of school... it wrote "You have to take Bahasa Kebangsaan in order to finish your pragramme."

My first thought was... "Shit! aren't I'm supposed to have exempted it? I get an credit in UEC wor... i remember last time that counselor told me I don't need to take BM!

If I really had to take it next sem... I have 20 credit hours in hand... and that is in short sem + jury and recital... oh god... no idea how am I going to go through that...

再来一杯寂寞的咖啡

2009-07-17T21:00:00.000-07:00

一直以来都相当喜欢张栋梁，没有太多华丽的音调，简单却唱出感情，这就是栋梁的特点吧？新的专辑相当不错哦！

沉默的瞬间

曲目

1）Sempurna

2）沉默的瞬间

3）低调

4）说你也一样爱着我

5）就是爱

6）我们都有错

7）男人不坏

8不要再听他写的歌了

9爱你胜过自己

10）幸福下一站

11）平静曲

2009-07-16T19:37:00.000-07:00

有一天，小男孩捡到一颗漂亮的石头。那颗石头不大，但却是红色的，而且还会发光呢！男孩很好奇，就拿了去问妈妈，这石头到底哪里神奇了？妈妈说，这颗石头阿，可是有神奇的力量哦！如果你长大了把它送给你喜欢的人，它会永远守护着你们。哇~这是“爱”的石头啊！小男孩把石头小心翼翼地收好，不让它不见。

时间过得很快，小男孩长大了。他去到大城市里工作，生活压力大得他无法透过气来。他也忘了要记得回家看看家中的父母。父母常常来电问寒，希望他不要累坏了身子。

一天，大男孩在街上看到一位漂亮的女孩坐在路边，他上前去问，有什么事情可以帮到你吗？那女孩说她饿了好几天没钱吃饭。男孩过不去就请了女孩去吃饭。女孩吃完饭后说了声谢谢就离开了。留下男孩在餐厅里独自继续用餐。

好几天都没再遇到那女孩，男孩想不起她漂亮的样子，但却无法忘了她。一天夜里，男孩做了个梦，梦里他拿着一颗红色的石头，微笑地将它给了那位女孩。当男孩醒来时，他赶快找出了那颗红色的石头。

他跑到当初遇见女孩的那个街边，希望能遇见女孩。可是女孩却迟迟未出现。

他等……街道的人是如此的冷漠。

他等……街道的人不理睬他。

他等……眼神中露出孤单。

他等……心中的期待慢慢暗淡。

他等……

当他快要放弃时，有人在他面前停下了脚步。
“跟我来。”他说。

男孩战战兢兢地跟着男人走，不明白到底要去哪里。

他们到了坟场，坟场很大，但不多墓碑，或许是新的坟场吧？坟场的中间，有个简朴的墓碑，男人停下了脚步。看着墓碑上的照片。男孩顺着他的眼神望了过去。

离开时，细雨轻轻地落在暗红的石头上。

Giving birth....

2009-07-11T10:37:00.000-07:00

Just now went to youtube... then it pops out the popular place there... giving birth... due to curiosity... I clicked and watched... and watched and watched... and I decided....

In my birthday I will thank my mom for giving birth....
If my wife give birth... I will hug her everyday... and I will plan... the "child planning"... and I will make the child to be good to his/her mom... and... I will be beside my wife when she give birth... and maybe.. I'm the one shouting... but.. I will be... beside her... until I faint... I promise to make her comfort... TT

God... I'm so sad man... how come... I so scared of blood!! and... now... I don't the power to move my leg.... shit....

2009-07-03T09:11:00.000-07:00

打开银幕，
看见没有你的夜。
解释，
自己。

歌曲放着，
唱着不知名的谁。
回想，
自己。

也许时间带过了，
也许自己想开了，
但是，
甜苦的回忆你知道又多伤人吗？

唱，自己。
明白的心情。
渴望这一切只是简单的噩梦而已。

笑，自己。
孤单的夜里。
明白时间会冲淡一切。

There goes my second handphone

2009-06-28T08:35:00.000-07:00

As my title... today while taking KTM... and got off and found out my phone is missing then I thought back that there's a guy kept of pushing me while we were trying to come out from the KTM. What a freaking unlucky day... I lost 2 handphones in half a year... luckily there's a nice friend have an extra hanphone to borrow me.... please leave u all d hp number here... thxx...

The last verse of Angels and Demons

2009-06-26T19:40:00.000-07:00

"Thank god for sending you to save our church."
"I don't believe that god send me."
"Haha.. Of course it's god that sent you here."

More concentration

2009-06-26T06:52:00.000-07:00

Finally I've decided to take class from dear MPO player. Since one of my friend say he is good so I liked to try out. The day started at wednesday noon. Straight after the Aural class I took my stuff and take bus from UCSI to the LRT Station with Xin Xin... Then I wait the train to come. The train arrived abit late after Xin Xin left so I just wished I won't be late for class as my class sheduled at 3.30pm. Then.. when I arived at Masjid Jamek it's already 3.20pm which i knew I will surely be late... so i sms the teacher and wished that it won't took so long to arrive. around 3.50pm I finally arrived at the station-- Setiawangsa... and... I walked over the bridge to the opposite condo... the condo was so nice... it's like hutan... then I went in... and... before entering the house I knew I've came the right house... because he opens the orchestra music so loudly.... haha... when I went in... I kena marah because of being late... and swear I will come by earlier next time. It was quite an experience to learn from a professional as he teaches you to think and play like a professional. But in the middle of the class... suddenly it's raining freakingly heavy... then when he send me out... he say... "Don't get too wet. haha" right... i didn't get too wet.. I get VERY wet. So that's the end of the experience from that class. HE gave me a piece that is freakingly hard for me and the cadenza is like... notes flying all over the bars... but I will finished it. Because it's an interesting piece. Then today went for major class and got "scold" by tutor for didn't memorised all the minor scales... actually... I did trying to memorized all but... it just can't get into my brain so he asked me try to watch the score and play the scale first then only memorized it. Somehow... it's one of the suckest class ever had because I didnt do well enough. Then I think... it's the concentration. I'm not concentrating enough in my daily practice or even I'm just think of "playing" the instrument everyday other than really put effort in every minute I play or practice.

"The one who success is the one who teach themself to practice and play."
"You rather than just practice an hour of 100% concentration other than 3 hours of non concentration practice."
"You have to practice and practice and practice until it's yours."
"It's the experience given from a teacher and you want to accept or not it's up to you."
"The earlier you change the habit the better for you."

Dude... Lim Yong Jia you are really not working hard enough... do better. work harder.

This is long...

2009-06-18T19:18:00.000-07:00

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 100 Truths about you. At the end, choose 15 people to be tagged.

WHAT WAS YOUR :

1. Last beverage : Milo

2. Last phone call : Shin Hong

3. Last text message : Emily

4. Last song you listened to : Minor scales...

5. Last time you cried : almost in a few minute ago... but its a decade ago for the real cry...

HAVE YOU EVER :

6. Dated someone twice : Hmm... guess so

7. Been cheated on : no

8. Kissed someone & regretted it : no

9. Lost someone special : yes

10. Been depressed : not really

11. Been drunk and threw up : no

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLOURS :

12. White

13. Pink

14. Blue

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU : (2009)

15. Made a new friend : alot

16. Fallen out of love : yes

17. Laughed until you cried : not that siao

18. Met someone who changed you : maybe?

19. Found out who your true friends were : no idea

20. Found out someone was talking about you : not yet... i dun care oso...

21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list : no..

22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life : ALL

23.How many kids do you want? : no idea...

24. Do you have any pets : yes.. ahjo!!

25. Do you want to change your name: no

26. What did you do for your last birthday : let it go through like a normal day

27. What time did you wake up today : 9.10m

28. What were you doing at midnight : watch a story book then die on the bed

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for : nothing right now...

30. Last time you saw your Mother : last sunday

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: My life

32. What are you listening to right now : The sound of the fan... lol

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom : no

34. What's getting on your nerves right now : nothing... early morning wat could get me

35. Most visited webpage : gmail.com

36. Whats your real name : Lim Yong Jia

37. Nicknames : too many

38. Relationship Status : single

39. Zodiac sign : Virgo

40. Male or female? : Male

41. Primary School? : SRJK(C) Kheow Bin... (dunno correct anot)

42. Secondary School? : Pin Hwa High School

43. High school/college? : UCSI

45. Long or short : wat long wat short

46. Height : 170cm++

47 Do you have a crush on someone? : ya...

48: What do you like about yourself? : hmm... no idea... i like to be myself

49. Piercings : no more

51. Righty or lefty : righty

FIRSTS :

52. First surgery : no

53. First piercing : ears

54. First best friend : in pre-school... forget the name edi... but still remember some of the times

55. First sport you joined : Badminton

56. First vacation : PENANG

59. Eating: nothing

60. Drinking: Milo

61. I'm about to: take a bath and go to school

62. Listening to : why so many listening... zzz

63. Waiting for: to finish this!

64. Want kids? : no idea

65. Get Married? : no idea

66. Career? : conductor lol...

WHICH IS BETTER:

67. Lips or eyes: eyes

68. Hugs or kisses: hug...

69. Shorter or taller: shorter

70. Older or Younger: younger...

71. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantic

72. Nice stomach or nice arms: both lol

73. Sensitive or loud: both...

74. Hook-up or relationship: relationship

75. Trouble maker or hesitant: cincai... i can manage i think lol

HAVE YOU EVER:

76. Kissed a stranger: no

77. Drank hard liquor: not really

78. Lost glasses/contacts: a few times?

79. Sex on first date: no

80. Broken someone's heart: no idea

82. Been arrested: no

83. Turned someone down : no idea

84. Cried when someone died: no

85. Fallen for a friend?: ya

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

86. Yourself: yes

87. Miracles: yes

88. Love at first sight: maybe

89. Heaven: no idea

90. Santa Claus: if i say yes please gimme an Buffet TOSCA pairs clarinet thx... and a Nissan Fairlady for coming Christmas...

91. Kiss on the first date: no idea

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: no

96. Ever cheated on somebody? : honestly yes

97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? I like now... but... going back to find Mozart seems a good idea... lol

98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be? Hmm... Go back and tear all the exam papers.

99. Are you afraid of falling in love? abit?

TAG... everyone I know... lol

Church week

2009-06-13T06:04:00.000-07:00

At first.. while I were chatting with a bunch of friends in msn last saturday... I had no idea... why I suddenly get so interested in going to church... maybe... something on my mind that makes me interested to know more about christian stuff. Then I tell Jia Wai and I went to his church on sunday... well.. I have nothing to comment except i like them to give out free lunch... haha... then... normal and busy day everyday... and then Emily told me that she going to the FGC(Is this correct?) to join an event. "Trip to the Hell" at first... I thought she was kidding due to the title... then I ask jia wai and he say it's an interesting event because he went before. Then we decided to go with jia wai and rou yen... hehe.. then... when we arrive there... my brain suddenly felt so empty... I got no idea how come soooo many people... although jia wai describe it before... then... we just go in and enjoy and listen to the pastor. When he describe some of the hell... I have one thing in my mind... I'm going to eat less meat... then... at the end... yun say must "share" with us someday. Well... sure... no problem. Then... we go yamcha at steven's corner and send emily balik... then send rou yen balik... and balik ourself... and... die on the bed.

抱着你

2009-06-05T08:27:00.000-07:00

Finally moved in...

2009-06-02T10:15:00.000-07:00

Today morning Jia Wai called me and told me that the auntie is moving out and we can move in... Then I get really excited... because... I finally can sleep more and don't have to wake up in the freaking early morning and go to school and sleep on the carpet... anymore. Then while I was deciding if I wanted to move in today... while figuring how to get transport... then we met Bi Ying and surprisingly... Bi Ying drive to school today!! So I begged lo... then she agree to help me to move in~~ Sooo happy!! Then after I packed and while Jia Wai and Su Wen is having lunch... we decided to go back because Jia Wai is late for his minor class... and.. he is late for 20min+ I think? then I go Watson to get personal stuff and we go to the house and started the cleaning job. After a few hours of sweeping, mopping and washing... we moved all stuff in... and go for the MPYO performance. While I just follow and company Verone shopping around KLCC. As for all... finally... I moved in!!! YEAH!!! and we're just lack of Shin Hong... he will be in this weekend lol~~ haha

P.S: Thx Bi Ying for being so helpful~

What a lame thing... ahaha

2009-06-01T07:39:00.000-07:00

1.Besides your lips, where is the favorite spot to get kissed?
face?
Har... cheek I guess?

2.How did you feel when you woke up this morning?
I'm going to sleep on the practice room carpet again...

3.Who was the last person/people you took a photo with?
No idea...

4.Would you consider yourself spoiled?
No I think... I'm such a good boy...

5.Will you ever donate blood?
Err... unless i'm faint... or not.. theres only 1% for me to donate.. i scare blood...

6.Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex?
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm........ BEST? I guess so?

7.Do you want someone to be dead?
NO

8.What does your last text message says?
"y" from dad... =.=

9.What are u thinking right now?
I want to practice the new book... and... should I ask for phone number? Jia En diam diam ah! haha

10. Do you want someone to be with you now?
I hope someone to drink with me... girl or boy oso can...

11.What was the time you went to bed last night?
11pm.. too tired

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing now?
My dad gave me where he get from his school... XL size... nice for sleeping.. haha

13.Is someone on your mind right now?
yup...

14.Who was the last person who text you?
MY DAD

ten luckly ppl..
1) Jia Wai
2) irene
3) Stephen
4) Bi Ying
5) Jia En
6) Rou Yen
7) Yong Yi (Is this correct?)
8) amelia
9) Ah liang
10) Su Wen

15. Who is no. 2 having a relationship with?
No idea...

16. Is no. 3 a male or a female?
MALE...

17. If no. 7 and and no. 1 get together, would it be a good?
Err... can say no mah? hahaha.. can test test see.. hehe.. jia wai...

18. What is no. 10 studying about?
Classical Piano

19. When was the last time you chatted with them?
THIS EVENING

20. Is no. 4 single?
Hell yeah... but she wanted to paired up so much... who wants her? hahahaha

no.21.Say something about no. 2
Nice friend. Good answer? haha

22.What do you think about no. 2 and no. 6 being together?
Not a good idea...

23.Describe no. 9.
Hmmmmmm..... Ah liang lo...

24. What will you do if no. 6 and no. 7 fight?
I will... sit and eat popcorn...

25. Do you like 8?
Har? What kinda question is this... zzz... ok.. like as a friend.. lol...

书

2009-06-01T07:32:00.000-07:00

打开，
那一夜。
你能感觉什么？
滔滔不绝的文字，
让人有点透不过气。

文字，
那一行。
你发现了什么？
滔滔不绝的故事，
让人有点透不过气。

小说，
那一本。
你看到了什么？
感人？开心？无聊？
让人抓摸不清。

书，
一堆书。
你察觉了什么？
不凡的经历，智慧。
让人获得不少。

A few problems to solve...

2009-06-01T07:26:00.000-07:00

Lets get started...

1) Should I get an extra instructor?

2) What am I suppose to play for the jury and recital?

3) Should I start to beat my brain up for thinking such nonsense?

4) Should I wash my brain?

5) Should I be sleeping MORE earlier?

6) Should I chase her?

7) What am I thinking?

8) Am I going nuts?

9) Should I see a doctor?

10) Should I stay alone more?

I don't know and wouldn't want to know more

2009-05-29T03:44:00.000-07:00

Alright... for my own sake I really don't feel to write these stuff out but well no choice... cause the situation is getting worse and worse and... I wouldn't want to get involved anymore. So lets get started. First... these few weeks we do done some quite exciting and well tiring run out. As the few post we had been going out for a week and go concerts and have a nice time. But the due to the "over excited" people started to get bored or maybe feel bad about it. Because surely not all of us likes to run out every night or go shopping every weekend. Then people start to feel bad and try to "avoid" her invitations. Then after the last "jokes" that she started or more correctly said all of us started, it had been continuously became the topic out from her. For a guy like me who had been normal to these topics... I'm ok... but for some... they don't like it. So problems occurred, as a friend we should be "pointing" out the problems that a friend have so that all of us could improve. Then, a "hero" came out and do that great task. but it ended up a failure. Because maybe he used the wrong time or wrong way to tell her. Then she started to angry because she knew that some of us talked something "bad" about her. And for someone that is so sensitive like her, normally will fights back... is it correct to say like this? Then... somehow... my friend called me to talk to her and she ask me too so I decided to chat about it... and I said... "You are just abit... hyperactive... " Then... things go around somehow... and things get complicated... and maybe she make it complicated... so I don't even know what the situation is and what she heard different comments from me and my friend. But to be said, different people surely have different view and opinion... but in an overall... we still think you are a good friend. It's true that you said that not everyone is perfect but if theres a people point out the problems why wouldn't you accept the comments? Maybe you can't change it all because if you feel it is not yourself anymore, but abit more consideration for others would be better I think? You said that GOD created everyone with different speciality, quite true but I'm pretty sure GOD would want you to learn to accept and change.

Maybe you can't accept us because we are younger than you, but these stuff arent' about age. Maybe you are the kind that who don't accept comments (well as you said so) why don't you try to change abit and I'm pretty sure that more people will like you about this. That goes the same thing to music isn't it? We play music and accept critics from people and comments in order to get better and perform better music. So why don't you think like that and apply that to your life? We really don't want to lost a friend like you, atleast I do... and the situation is... it's not we are the ones who are giving up on you but instead it's yourself to give up upon a chance to be better.

Well I think that's all I can only said... even theres' more I might be lazy to write it down. But to point out one thing, i am not critisizing instead I'm trying to tell you. it's up to you either you can accept or not.

MP3!!!

2009-05-18T05:39:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Jia Wai, Bi Ying, Shin Hong, Joy and I went to Lowyat Plaza. Our target is to get Jia Wai a Mp3 that can record sound, get Joy's handphone fixed and buy music accesories at chamber music. First... Jia Wai never came to lowyat before... and he almost pengsan seeing soooo many electornic gadgets, and all of us can't stop looking around at those gadgets even talking and walking... then finally, Joy gave her hp for checking while waiting to see how much it cost to repair. Then, when we decide to get something to eat since all of us are soooo hungry, don'y know why Jia Wai got attracted to one shop near the exit and ask for the Sony Walkman Mp3 player price. Then... after a chat... Jia Wai told me if I want to buy Mp3. I asked how much. He said 4G walkman mp3 RM119. I asked and asked MANY MANY time... then the shopkeeper took a calculater and press the number out... RM119. We can't believe our eyes... then I wanted to buy sooo much and borrowed RM100 from Jia Wai.. (I will give back you don't scare) but unluckily the Mp3 can't record instead another model which is a newer model has. More expensive but also quite worth it because they give alot of discount on it too. Then, we go makan and chat along sooo many 18sx topic... and then Bi Ying ran away to eat dinner with her family... and we go back lowyat to get Joy's hp. We waited there sooooo long, from 6pm~7.30pm I guess? then when I got home is 9pm. Luckily dad didn't scold me... lol

Another funny thing is... Jia Wai told me yesterday night that his MP3 have problem... then I laughted till die because first day buy then rosak... then today we went to lowyat AGAIN to change a new MP3, then the shopkeeper tested the MP3 and give Jia Wai a new one. haha... then while Joy trying to get her handfree repaired... we ran almost ALL shop that had SAMSUNG logo on it... and finally the customer service centre told us to go PJ. WTH... then we give up to repair it and came back~ that's all for todays cover... wah... since like it's been a long time for me to write daily issues into blog... haha

Tired... And exhausted...

2009-05-16T08:45:00.000-07:00

Maybe this week I've been going out with friends everyday... and came back home quite late... and... wake up super early in the next morning... My mind told me to shut down... It is sooo tired... and I can't even play my instrument nicely...

As Jia Wai said... we went out EVERYDAY this week... and start from the magazine I watch at the MPH... Joy became soooooo "horny"? and then at thursday I went to Joy's house... then.. I lay on her bed while bi ying oso laying there... then we joke about having babies.. lol.. ahaha... then Joy siao liao ever since she play with the doll in Nicholas's car... everything she say will came out something... "hamsap"... then yesterday we went to bangkok jazz to watch Adil perform.. nice performance! but the place we sit is too noisy because nearer to the drumset. Bi ying is soooooo excited when she saw one drink called "Blowjob" and well... we thought its a normal beer something so we call and decided to share.. who know.. when it came... it is soooo small glass... and then I learned tht its a shooter... zzz... and it costs me RM21!! SOOO EXPENSIVE!!! So.. quite tired now... wanna go slp edi.. so blog next time... haha...

寂寞

2009-05-07T07:56:00.000-07:00

我不喜欢哭，
因为很伤；
我不喜欢笑，
因为很苦。
原因没有为什么，
没有，
什么好说。

我不喜欢悲，
因为太疼；
我不喜欢梦，
因为太真。
不谈是为了什么，
只想，
淡淡吸进这口烟。

好想哭，
好想哭；
让眼泪流下滴到地上干去，
好想哭，
好想哭；
不要让疼痛的感觉压在心里，
只想让自己，
默默吞掉。

我不喜欢流泪，
流泪太表现；
我喜欢假装，
没事的模样。
吐了一口烟，
烦恼都没了，
就让它随烟凤漂流。

好想哭，
好想哭；
让眼泪流下滴到地上干去，
好想哭，
好想哭；
不要让疼痛的感觉压在心里，
只想让自己，
默默吞掉。

微笑地带过一切所有，
只想为了掩盖所有的空虚！

好想哭，
好想哭；
让眼泪流下滴到地上干去，
好想哭，
好想哭；
不要让疼痛的感觉压在心里，
只想让自己，
默默吞掉。

吞掉的自己，
没有了回忆。

伤

2009-05-03T07:11:00.000-07:00

我需要静静，
我需要思考。
为什么这样？
为什么悲伤？

哭，
能解决任何事吗？
哭，
能让悲伤流走吗？
不能，
我不相信，
哭。

笑，
能解决任何事吗？
笑，
能让悲伤带过吗？
不能，
我不相信，
笑。

我需要静静，
我需要思考。
为什么这样？
为什么悲伤？

爱上了，
最痛的是什么？
爱上了，
最疼得是什么？

恨上了，
最痛的是什么？
恨上了，
最伤的是什么？

微笑，
带过。
痛苦，
带过。

悲伤。

This is so true... About my zodiac... How come?

2009-04-29T09:57:00.000-07:00

A friend sent me an e-mail about Zodiac stuff... and its so true for me... How come ya?

VIRGO MAN

Time is precious for Virgo man and if you make him wait, he will consider
that as an insult. He hates to hear criticism and hates to be criticize. If
he is criticizing other people, then he must be influenced by other Zodiac.
He is and he likes to be a perfectionist. He always think he is doing the
right and appropriate thing , and often he thinks he makes no mistake. He is
a bright guy and could accept comments if he thinks it can improve himself.
He is the type who well adjusted to make changes.

He will spent money carefully and spent it worthwhile. He will only
extravagant for his personnel pleasure only. He is quite romantic, a type of
guy who can drive 100 miles just to tell you how much he misses you. If he
does not care about you, he will not even spent a dime to call you locally.
Long distant special low rate call is also out of the question.

He hates rough and crude people. His woman has to be clean and dress well.
He inspects any thing in details beside being a perfectionist, so you could
be lying in your bikini with a perfect figure and he can suddenly comments
you about your big feet. If you gain 2 pounds , he may comments you are
getting too fat. Before going out with this kind of guy, look at yourself
head to toe in the mirror and ask yourself if you are really and entirely
ready. Unless he dates a model, then he will have less comments.

He is neat and tidy, so his life always in a schedule, a fix time to lunch,
the same time to go home. He is well knowledge about food and conscious
about nutrition, so you won't see this guy eating a junk food, or strange
and exotic food for sure.

You will see him in social events or party if only necessary. He is gifted
with acting, so if he says he can not go out with you because he is sick,
then you will belief him. He is a hard to please when it comes to what to
eat, how to work, what kind of a woman to date. He always neat and tidy all
the times, even if he is in the army, he will be the cleanest soldier in the
camp. He likes to speak properly with no slang. He hates laziness and lazy
people. He always act like a boring mature adults, but getting to know him ,
you will know he has his own charm.

He always see things clearly, so he is not the type to be blinded by love.
He is a kind and cool guy, but if constantly irritate with rudeness,
ignorant, or stupidity then he will show you that he is annoyed. You may see
a guy in this Zodiac dress up in an old shirt and old Jean, but if you look
carefully, you will see that his hair is neat and unconsciously he will
touch his hair a lot. His desk is always neat and if he sees small scrap
paper on the floor, he will pick it up or put it in the basket.

People may think he is selfish, because when he says 'No', he really means
it. Any favor asked , he will help but always in his own limit. The more he
see faults in others, the less he wants people to see his. If you want him
to change his faults, try to tell him gently or he could take it as an
insult.

He wants love that comes with quality, so he only has a few loves in his
life. Woman's trick will not work with him. If he breaks up with a woman, he
will also try to avoid all her friends and her environments too. He is very
picky and every breaking up, he will be double careful next time.

He can sweep woman with his charm, but he likes to keep his relationship
like a friend. He likes a sincere self confident woman, neat and clean,
perfect and tidy. A real two 'P' , picky and perfectionist Zodiac.

Music life?

2009-04-23T10:34:00.000-07:00

Chatting with a senior... and he asked... Do you know what you want to do by studying music? I said yes. I'm clear by what I wanted to do in my life. But he said... do you think you will succeed? Things will change when u study degree in school. I know, sometimes life thinking changes due to certain conflicts and experience. Who knew maybe tomorrow i came out becoming an Jazz player?(Although it sounds quite impossible) But life is all about changing. So, dear music friends... Are you clear on what you really wanted to do? Some say study music is for fun. Some say they had nothing else to study. Some say... He study to waste his time and get a freaking degree. So which kind are we?

Then dunno how our topic goes into "kiasu" which means scare to lose. I believe everyone scare to lose to other people... but sometimes there is really no need to compare with others. Comparing with others makes you want to improve yourself, that is quite true. And I had to admit that I had been comparing with people even my own teacher. I want to improve more than I AM SUPPOSED to be. I wanted to go further than anyone can. Eventhough maybe its true that I'm not that talented or what but I just want to walk to there. And to prove myself that I can do what I want to. Here comes another thing, when it comes into music or other stuff such as exam marks... I don't really care too much. Which sometimes I don't really know why. Maybe it benefits me because lets me to feel much more happier.

Then suddenly came into my mind that... Zue asked me what Music means to me. To me, Music is Life. Music reflected Life. What is life then? Life is experience. And we should enjoy life. No people is born to suffer, even some are born in some places that are bad situated but enjoy every little moment of life will surely brings you its benefits. To me, even life is hard but I enjoys it. haha... a 19 year old guy said something like this... Who will believe? Nevermind... It's my mind. Oh... is that consider a Wisdom? haha

To

2009-04-23T05:56:00.000-07:00

To the skies above,
To the seas below.
To my fear heart,
To my lonely part.

Free to think,
Free to live.
Free to be,
Free to dream.

Finally finished our final exam~

2009-04-20T07:06:00.000-07:00

Finally final exam is finished~ So happy~

Malaysian Music

2009-04-16T21:20:00.000-07:00

Today I woke up early in the morning at 7am just to study... then I study like freaking mad... and just to hope I could pass this subject. Yesterday after a tiring performance at KLpac, I study until midnight 3am. Just hoping I could pass this subject. Then a few minutes before my friend called me and asked where am I. I'm at home. YES. The exam started at 10am and I still in my house. I thought the exam started at 2.30pm. and for god sake, I missed the freakin' exam! AND THAT MEANS... I need to retake unless I could take the sub paper... but I don't think I'm able to do that because I just missed the exam without any reason. And so I'm starting to think how and I going to explain to my dear parents how come I failed my subject and get suspended for another semester. Whatever... since it's fucking fate that decided to fail me so just let it be... and it's not that bad since Ken Ny oso missed the exam. What a coincidence that two "Kenny" miss the exam. Well of course I'm abit angry of myself that why and how come I would miss the exam time? That teach me a lesson as well, and I'm VERY angry because i didn't slept well last night just to study! ARGH! Whatever!!! I want to sleep right now. FUCK YOU MALAYSIAN MUSIC!

EXAM & PERFORMING WEEK!!!

2009-04-15T19:23:00.000-07:00

Today... is the 1st day of the KLpac Down Under Australia Month performance... and it's the day of my theory exam... well actually I'm not worried about the theory exam... but instead I'm worried about tomorrow's exam --- MALAYSIAN MUSIC. As today is the 1st performance day... I will not have the time to study until the performance finish... and that sucks! I had to study now... which I am doing it... and because it's too bored I can't concentrate while trying to fall asleep! So I decided to come here and blog abit for refreshing my poor brain and continue to "absord" the stuff so I won't get expended!!! Well, that's all. Tonight will be a great night I hope. Will try to catch some pictures during the rehearsal and performance... hehe...

EMO

2009-04-11T09:16:00.000-07:00

Just now chatting with an old friend and I found out he is so damned emo... I almost had a fight with him... then when I finished chatting with her... I felt another thing... I am one of the emo guys out there... too...

KLpac day

2009-04-05T03:28:00.000-07:00

Today I woke up early because I'm too bored. Yes... I'm bored until I don't even know what should I eat for breakfast. Then I simply finished up the hot dogs I bought yesterday and drank a cup of orange juice... then I set off to KLpac.. It sounds weird but I go so early because to join the Nonami's band... just because I'm too bored... and another point is that I don'y know how to go KLpac so I asked my friend to wait me at the bus stop opposite Kuen Cheng High School... Who knows... When I got there... I can't get U-turn to the opposite bus stop... So I gave up and decided to try to go myself... I drive slowly and watched the sign boards... and as I predicted... Finally I found the way to KLpac! I was so happy. Then wait my friend awhile and we go in to practice... After a long time didn't play with a band.. Feels quite weird with the marching style of palying. But quite nice the songs that Nonami wrote. Quite happy with the practice and I met Song Yiew! and also the Mr. Tan Eng Ping (The technician in charge of MPO and MPYO instruments) which surprisingly he is a clarinet player oso! And another 2 happy stuff is that Xue Ying borrowed me a method book to photostat! And it's a damn cool method book!!! and Song Yiew gave me his teacher's phone number! MPO player Matthew Larsen. I might want to learn from him then... haha~and after the practice I go lunch with Xue Ying... then we practice again... for the KLpac Orchestra... then after finish rehearsal... it's raining damn heavy... Tong Kiat asked me to go for a drink.. so we drank at the cafe... and 1 cup of cuppocino costs me RM9+... WHICH IS DAMNED EXPENSIVE!!! But no choice... I have to pay also... Then we go home... on the way I was thinking why a motorcyclist horn me and point at me... then I started to realize that the car is abit noisy... when I almost home I found out another thing... the car door of the passenger seat isnt close tightly! It must be Xue Ying that didn't close tightly... but I wonder why the car didn't giv signal to me? HAHA... but thats for the day.. spent almost the whole day at KLpac... Hoooh...

Amway?

2009-04-03T11:15:00.000-07:00

Today old friend came all the way to my house... then I had the feeling that he is up to something... and it's a BINGO! We go to the stalls near my house and I have my "dinner" which is actually supper already.. it's 11pm. Then he start "presenting" his stuff... and ya it's about joining Amway and selling stuff. Part-time sales. Which I really not interested but I joined... because main point is the benefits that attracts me... 2nd thing is that my friend seems really serious about the stuff so I might just helped him out the first year. Whatever... then Jia Wai telling me that he hates Amway and he says that their product not really good... and so... I don't really know why I'm involved in this sales stuff either. Hmmmmmm.....

Daily Prophet?

2009-03-26T22:04:00.000-07:00

After waking up at 9.30am... which is quite late for me... walking dizzily down the stairs then wasting my time in front of the pc... Well.. Today is her recital day... to be truth its now. I was thinking should I go and watch her? Mostly well they will say yes... but instead I helped Ahjo to bath because he having worms all over it's body and thinking of it gave me goosebumps...

P.S. I decided to go and watch her recital... I drive damn fast at my ever first time... but I missed her recital... and I felt so bad. Damn Ahjo!

^^

2009-03-26T08:58:00.000-07:00

She's working with her recital this week... and following her jury. Yesterday I made a little "card" which hopes her to have a good recital performance and pass her jury. I didn't gave her today, and I don't know why. After a while of thinking... I remembered her words. If faith together, then it's faith. So, I might happy to reminded myself with that. Why would I need to worry for? Why would have to think soooo much about this stuff?

Well... normally she will check my blog... So I might just write it out here...

Dear,

I know I might be stupid to be jealous or whatever, and I know I might not able to give you all the things you needed now. But I really mean it right now. And I just wanna look at you, and say:" Dear, I love you." and I'm happy to be with you.

OMG... Course Selection...

2009-03-26T07:11:00.000-07:00

I tried to do course selection online just now...
and it ended up I can't get into the course selection thing...
It's kinda pissed off since the deadline is tomorrow I think...
And if I were late to do course selection... I had to pay RM100 penalty... and that is something really not nice to do...
So... all i can do is pray... and hope that tomorrow I can do course selection...
Don't ask me who I pray to...
Surely not Buddha or Jesus... and VERY SURELY NOT ALAH!
I just hoped that everything will be fine...
In other way...
Everything WILL be fine...
Because I believed in the power of "The Secret"...
Smile~

P.S. Jia Wai told me that I can't use Firefox to browse that stupid e-advantage... and luckily... I finished the course selection from using the Windows Explorer! So happy~

Tired body with tired mind...

2009-03-23T05:08:00.000-07:00

Today... forced myself to wake up... because too tired... somemore not enough sleep...

then...

Go to school... AND... SLEEP!

When wake up... bad thing happen... Maybe due to the inappropriate sleeping position on the piano chair.... My shoulder and neck feel so hurt.

So... I've decided.

Today I must go to sleep earlier!

10.30pm meet me in my bed! HAHA

不明白

2009-03-20T10:09:00.000-07:00

我不明白，也不想知道。为什么，会有这种感觉？为什么会失望？明明说不介意，顾虑到她的心情。我，也不知道自己到底在想些什么？很想喝杯酒，可是家里找不到……哈哈……我不知道自己愁些什么。她说如果有缘就一定能在一起……哈哈……很天真吧？我觉得，要在一起，就不要想太多。可能男生跟女生的想法有差别就在这个地方吧？我觉得有点累，不是跟她在一起的累，是想她的累。那一天只要能看到她，跟她聊聊几句我就会很高兴，哈哈……我更天真吧？真的很希望自己能明白自己……也希望她能多“关心”一下我……如果她也有同感。

讲到最后……我都不明白自己讲什么……哈哈……

有些东西能随便，有些东西随便过后就什么都没有了。

BAD DAY

2009-03-12T06:45:00.001-07:00

So tired today... from the moment I opened my eyes... they tell me:"Damn you, can you sleep more?" Thanks to the hardworking of mine... 2 days of orchestra until 10pm.. It's damn tired. Believe me.. you won't even wanted to try this if you had to wake up at 5.45am EVERYDAY. The worst stuff is... I'm not in a good mood today... even going to minor class also can feel the teacher not happy that i'm not concentrating in playing the piano... then after home... kena nag again... suck.

I was thinking why such bad mood today... maybe one of the BIGGEST main causes is I don't have enough sleep, second thing is that my mouth got a "hole" and I can't practice nicely with my clarinet... I'm feeling so bad about it. Suck la. BAD MOOD!

Don't know why, I was thinking... Maybe... I started to have the stupid strong feel... about her. Every time she goes for class or well... I'm the one who is busying with my class... I don't even have time to speak nicely with her except using msn or sms... I felt so bad... or maybe... I just want to be with her more.

If That's OK With You
Singer: Shayne Ward

I love the way that you look without your make up
I had a girl before we met but we broke up
There's something 'bout you that makes me want to step up
Step up and be with you
If That's Ok With You

We'll keep the neighbors awake too late too late
Cos imma make you feel so good that's how I see it happening
Yeah we'll keep the neighbors awake too late too late
Cos baby I wanna step up and be with you
If that's ok with you

CHORUS:
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you

I wanna keep your toothbrush at my appartment
Make a second set of keys and ask you to move in
I'm not crazy
I know what I'm getting myself in
I wanna live with you
If that's ok with you

CHORUS:
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you

If that's ok with you

CHORUS:
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
Yeah yeah

We'll keep the neighbors awake too late too late
I wanna love you this way that way this way
We'll keep the neighbors awake too late too late
I wanna love you this way that way this way

CHORUS:
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
I'm gonna love you

I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you
If that's ok with you

Finally~

2009-03-07T05:48:00.001-08:00

Finally, I've waited and waited... dreamed and dreamed... my dad is back from london with my beloved Buffet R13!! Lets see!!

Because the ppl over there tested the instrument, so my dad bring back the instrument only, without the box. Hehe...

Too blur... Can't saw the logo... Buffet Crampon~

AHHH~~ So nice~

Thats all~ Loved the instrument after testing it... can't stop playing it... but had to stop due to breaking in it... TT
Nvm since I will be spending many years with it later... haha~

You asked me.

2009-03-06T03:19:00.000-08:00

You asked me,
and I think.
If you will be sorry.

You asked me,
and I think.
If we're not together.

Why, I liked to ask.
Why, I want to know.
Why, and why.

You asked me,
and I think.
Will I hate you.

You asked me,
and I think.
Why would I?

Maybe I'm bad in showing,
how I liked or loved you.
But,
truly and sincerely,
I am.

So, if you really.
And so,
I still.

Loved you.

希望

2009-02-28T05:59:00.000-08:00

希望，
人生能够精彩。
希望，
愿望能够成真。
希望，
爱情能够永久。
希望，
唔……世界和平。

有了希望，
就有机会。

有了希望，
就会开朗。

我希望，真的。
我希望，一切。
我希望，你，
能开心。

Getting new clarinet!!!

2009-02-28T05:52:00.000-08:00

Dad going to London tonight!! and so waiting him to come back with my new "wife" -- Clarinet~ I've been dreaming of the Buffet R13 Clarinet for so long... and finally the wish come true!! Haha!! I swear that I will work more and more harder from today on! No mather what stuff, practising, rehearsal or chasing girls! I don't want to regret in my life! as I promised to myself, do my best! work my best!

p.s: Will update the first second I got my beloved R13!!

WTH! LEFT 4 DEAD!

2009-02-28T05:47:00.001-08:00

Ever since go and play the FPS zombie killing game with those collegue... It seems like I'm abit addicted to this god damned FPS game.. Then getting the cd even worse... playing it the whole day and it is soooo fun! LOL

Orchestra

2009-02-25T07:43:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I skipped the school orchestra due to I have a world music mid-term exam today and I really really don't want to fail that subject. Knowing that I would be scold by the conductor for such irresponsibility acts... for the guy I am... I STILL WANT TO SKIP! And so, I skipped and got home and study my world music. Luckily for today's exam I managed to answer most of the questions. Even though I don't know is the answer correct or not. Well, when I go to school today... many of the senior orchestra members keep on telling me the same thing :" You're going to die next week since you skipped the orchestra class... the conductor is so angry." and the response I gave is a face of nothing will happen and say:"Is it? What to do... I have mid-term." and they kept on discipline me, and well of course I don't really care about it. For the very first idea of NOT going to the orchestra is that the school orchestra is SUCK. And the conductor... well.. no offense but she is not a very good conductor.

After getting "advise" from those seniors at school, thinking of today going to KLpac Orchestra would change my happy view of it... who knows when we get there there are only 4 wind players.. and it is damn bored that the clarinet "senior" teaching us in the sectional... If I haven't took a nap in my friends car.. I would have slap that guy in face and ask him to go back and learn to teach and lead. When the practice was finally over.. I was damn relieved at that moment and I enjoyed not to play for the orchestra well atleast for today. To note I like and totally loved orchestra... but playing along with stupid orchestra... I have no idea why and how come the conductor and kept on conduct like theres a perfect orchestra for him.

But well we should have thinked the other way of it... playing along with any standard of orchestra we still learn things. I should be happy then... haha... well think the positive way...

P.S: I've passed the mid-term test! So happy!~

Contemperory? Classical?

2009-02-20T20:58:00.000-08:00

I was thinking why people so concern between classical and contempt music? Actually all of these are music.. enjoying music is the main point isn't it? Only the practice module or the basics are different. So why some people says that they hate the music? Though it may comes over a personal likes but we can't judge others' music by giving own opinion isn't it? Lucky I love both contempt nor classical music~ So what's the big deal of these? If you can't understand other people. No mather how good you play, you still as bad as you are. Music is life.

你

2009-02-20T20:51:00.000-08:00

看着你，让我安宁。
望着你，让我相信。
我不知道，
也不想知道，
未来。

想着你，让我担心。
梦见你，让我相信。
我不知道，
也不想知道，
以后。

我只知道，
也只相信，
我，
会用尽一切去爱你。

我只知道，
也只相信，
我，
会珍惜现在的一切。

1 month?

2009-02-19T18:06:00.000-08:00

I was thinking that why I can let "her" go that easily... after a heartache of 4 years... It's abit weird that human can give up so easily on something when the enviroment or something around them changed. This year I've successfully apply myself into a local university to study music. Although the dream of mine is going oversea, but I found that my skills are not good enough, so maybe study more in local is a good idea. And so, going to university is a new stuff for me, get to learn new things and find new friends, ah ya, as they said. FIND GIRLS.

At first I though my university life is going to be something quite similar to highschool, practice and study. and talking about relationship... I might as well be alone for my normal college life. I'm still wearing the necklace with her name on it, so I might be aware not to get into any relationship... and what is so funny that.. theres a girl, and i liked her... well after a few times meeting her. The first time sending her back is after accompanying her and a friend at mid-valley, where its abit too late then I decided to send them back. 2nd time is her birthday, she don't have transport because her darling (car) is taken away by her to go to work. So I go and fetch her to mid-valley and meet up others to celebrate and send her back again. Thinking about these.. I wonder why I'm so nice to her... so I was thinking and thinking all over... and stupidly I typed "What am I thinking... " for my msn pm. and forgotten that she is one very busybody girl and she kept on asking what am I thinking...

After a few "refuses" I finally telled her and she thought I'm kidding... and just because i typed "Dun perasan la~ haha" something like that, and actually that is for escaping... because guys scared to being rejected... well after many attempts. and so back to school life, I don't know is that I kept on sticking her or she sticking me... because when i practice she will find me... and when she practice I will disturb her too. i thought she accepted me... haha... then got one day she feel dizzy... I was so moody because of that.. ( I'm not a guy very easy to be moody, unless I want to.) I go eat dinner with friends, not even finishing the expensive spaghetti (I found that the spaghetti is not nice at all...) I straightly go back school to see her if she is ok. Well... she turned out to be quite better abit... and the later orchestra practice I can't even concentrate.. well, what a funny thing...

So, yesterday while chatting with her in the msn. Her natural busybody nature comes again... asking who is "my dear", I haven't answer but she guessed it out the idea though... she called me to say what I wanted to say.. well.. again.. after a few "refuses" I typed "I like u""told u last week alraedy what... need people say so many time d ah?" Then I was thinking what kinda reactions she will give.. she replied that she thought I was kidding... then says that she will think about it... and so give her 1 month. I said that it's ok for me.. take your time.. if you need 1 year its also ok. Before going off to sleep I asked her that why she want to consider about it. She say I a blur guy.. ah.. well I admit that... she say do I mean that if she consider about it that means she ave something about me inside her? I say I don't know... then she say.. sure got la... if not why she want to consider a guy she don't like at all?

Thats' all for today, and so... I liked to be myself for this 1 month.. or even... everyday in either infront or behind her... I'll just be myself.

p.s: The necklace had been thrown away after a few incidents. lol

Oh gosh... COLLEGE!

2009-02-13T19:57:00.000-08:00

After a few months, and I got myself into UCSI University... and so study the stuff I always wanted--MUSIC~ So that's why the title for this year's blog is so called "NO MUSC NO LIFE!" well the 19 啦啦啦~ is something else and will talked about it later then. Well, decided to use more english to write in this blog because thinking of improving my english language using. Of course will still use chinese to continue my writing... haha.. okie then, lets stop for introducing~